The best part of the fiction in many novels is the notice that the characters are purely imaginary.

There are plenty of good five-cent cigars in the country. The trouble is they cost a quarter. What this country really needs is a good five-cent nickel.

Good habits result from resisting temptation.

I hate the pollyanna pest who says that all is for the best.

The enemy came. He was beaten. I am tired. Goodnight.

No one can have a higher opinion of him than I have - and I think he is a dirty little beast.

He, in a few minutes ravished this fair creature, or at least would have ravished her, if she had not, by a timely compliance, prevented him.

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined.

There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers.

Of all the unbearable nuisances, the ignoramus that has travelled is the worst.