The more I study religions the more I am convinced that man never worshipped anything but himself

What torture, this life in society! Often someone is obliging enough to offer me a light, and in order to oblige him I have to fish a cigarette out of my pocket.

When she was a small girl, Amanda hid a ticking clock in an old, rotten tree trunk. It drove woodpeckers crazy. Ignoring tasty bugs all around them, they just about beat their brains out trying to get at the clock. Years later, Amanda used the woodpecker experiment as a model for understanding capitalism, Communism, Christianity, and all other systems that traffic in future rewards rather than in present realities.

Aliter catuli longe olent, aliter sues.<br> ("Puppies and pigs have a very different smell.")

Virginity is in the lies of the beholder.

Celibacy is not hereditary.

We may eventually come to realize that chastity is no more a virtue than malnutrition.

I knew her before she was a virgin.

Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes.

Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger.