I am firm. You are obstinate. He is a pig-headed fool.

Good taste is the worst vice ever invented.

It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.

I wonder how so insupportable a thing as a bookseller was ever permitted to grow up in the Commonwealth. Many of our modern booksellers are but needless excrements, or rather vermin.

At age 50, every man has the face he deserves.

Advertising is the modern substitute for argument; its function is to make the worse appear the better.

Fashions are the only induced epidemics, proving that epidemics can be induced by tradesmen.

The art of taxation consists in so plucking the goose as to obtain the largest possible amount of feathers with the smallest amount of hissing.

There is just one thing I can promise you about the outer-space program: your dollar will go further.

An income tax form is like a laundry list -- either way you lose your shirt.