He who builds a better mousetrap these days runs into material shortages, patent-infringement suits, work stoppages, collusive bidding, discount discrimination--and taxes."

It is a far, far better thing to have a firm anchor in nonsense than to put out on the troubled sea of thought.

Only exceptionally rational men can afford to be absurd.

If you go in for argument, take care of your temper. Your logic, if you have any, will take care of itself.

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk?

Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative.

The absence of alternatives clears the mind marvelously.

Confusion is always the most honest response.

The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time.

He is indebted to his memory for his jests and to his imagination for his facts.