A self-balancing, 28-jointed adaptor-based biped; an electro-chemical reduction plant, integral with segregated stowages of special energy extracts in storage batteries, for subsequent actuation of thousands of hydraulic and pneumatic pumps, with motors attached; 62,000 miles of capillaries....

Fear is the tax that conscience pays to guilt.

The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead.

I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell my children that, they just about throw up.

Warning signs that lover is bored:<br> 1. Passionless kisses<br> 2. Frequent sighing<br> 3. Moved, left no forwarding address.

The charity that hastens to proclaim its good deeds, ceases to be charity, and is only pride and ostentation.

Women with pasts interest men... they hope history will repeat itself.

SURE-FIRE SINGLES AD:<br> Famous Writer needs woman to organize his life and spend his money. Loves to turn off Sunday football and go to the Botanical Gardens with that special someone. Will obtain plastic surgery if necessary.

Women are cursed, and men are the proof.

I require three things in a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.