Every now and then when your life gets complicated and the weasels start closing in, the only cure is to load up on heinous chemicals and then drive like a bastard from Hollywood to Las Vegas ... with the music at top volume and at least a pint of ether.

What can be more palpably absurd than the prospect held out of locomotives travelling twice as fast as stagecoaches?

Inventions reached their limit long ago, and I see no hope for further development.

No flying machine will ever fly from New York to Paris ... [because] no known motor can run at the requisite speed for four days without stopping.

There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in their home.

It is difficult to say what is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow.

It would appear that we have reached the limits of what it is possible to achieve with computer technology, although one should be careful with such statements, as they tend to sound pretty silly in 5 years.

After several minutes of utterly dull conversation I began to think of her not as a woman but as a human, then not as a human but as an animal, then not as an animal but as a source of high-grade protein.

The friendly cow all red and white,<br> I love with all my heart:<br> She gives me cream with all her might;<br> to eat with apple tart.

The ultimate test of a relationship is to disagree but hold hands.